Sunday, July 31, 2016

I'm Tired!

I'm tired. So tired of stress caused by other people. So tired of dealing with people who never learned manners or how to behave. I'm tired of people telling me to be more sensitive (politically correct) when it comes  my beliefs. I'm tired of seeing people abuse animals and children. I'm sick and tired of women thinking abortion (murder) is birth control. I'm sick of Christians walking away instead of standing up for what they believe. I'm angry that parents don't get the fact that when a child is born, it isn't about them anymore.

My lupus is on high alert today hitting every joint, I'm swollen and in horrible pain. Thanks a lot stress! I read an article recently telling all who suffer from lupus to control your trigger points. How, pray tell, can you control other people who cause stress?!

It also stresses me out when I realize there are so many people who are so naive. Instead of listening to both sides and making common sense decisions they just listen and accept without question. Before this election process began, I had a hard time understanding how the anti-christ yet to come would be admired and accepted by so many. It appears common sense isn't so common anymore. People are too accepting without question.

I watch Judge Jeanine every Saturday night. She is one sharp cookie. She peels off the sugar coating politicians pour over truth (in other words blatant lies) and gets down to the facts.

I can only hope others will hear what she has to say and wake up. This election is not about putting a woman in the White House. It is about so many more important things that affect our day to day lives. If you don't like Trump, fine. Vote for the issues at hand. Just don't listen to the news media and let them decide for you. Just listen. Get out of the "see what you want to see and hear what you want to hear" mindset and start looking at the facts.
Click on the link below.

Friday, July 29, 2016

I've Had Enough!

 Tonight I stepped on the porch to feed my kitties. A big dog ran up to my porch and tried to bite me. This isn't the first time it has happened. The people in the building next door let their huge dog run around loose. The police have been to that residence five times (counting tonight) since they moved in in November of last year.

Instead of coming over and getting her dog and leaving, she stood on my doorstep and harassed and threatened me. She just kept going over and over and over. Threatened to beat my cats. Threatened me. I'm so thankful my next door neighbor stepped out onto the porch and saw the whole thing including the dog being aggressive.

I kept telling her to leave my porch. She just got worse. She even started yelling at my neighbor when she, too, told her to leave. I told her if she didn't go I'd call 911. She wouldn't budge. I dialed 911 and she walked off.

Two officers came. The first one from Nicholasville listened to what happened and went straight over to her and spent more time with her. When he returned, my neighbor was outside with me. He only said I could file charges and that he could do nothing unless he saw the incident himself.  Only told her to stay away from me and keep the dog on a leash.

The Wilmore officer said more when he arrived. He listened to what we said. I kept reiterating how her harassment was more of a concern to me. He, too, said I could file charges, that he would write up what had happened, and tell her himself that if she came back on this property she would go to jail.

I am utterly amazed. A policeman has to see the incident in order to do something about it. First one had no intention of doing anything. The second one got it.

I'm so tired of this! Isn't there anywhere safe you can live anymore? To think I moved here to get away from crime!

Tuesday, July 19, 2016

The Final Events

This is one of the best film explanations of the last days I  have seen. Strictly by the Bible. If these scary times are causing great fear in your life, it helps to know why and what is coming.

Monday, July 18, 2016

Blood Test Reports

Received a call from my rheumatologist's office last week. Said my kidney function numbers were not great. But instead of saying if I had any problems to call them, they said this, "If you have any pain or problems with your kidneys, call your local MD." 

I've been diagnosed with systemic lupus for 22 years now. My rheumatologist in Dothan would have put me in the hospital and monitored me for this issue. The rheumatologist here told me to go to another doctor. What's wrong with this picture?! Sad thing is the local MD would have asked me if this wasn't something the rheumatologist should deal with. 

As far as health care was concerned, I was a fool to move from Alabama. Now I can't afford to move back. 

Live and learn.

Tuesday, July 12, 2016

Slowing to a Crawl

As the heat, humidity and dew point go up, and the rain increases, I slow down to a crawl. Weather beats me up. Lupus flares. Today I feel so sick. Just can't function.

Last week I saw my rheumatologist. She spent the time telling me I need to get a plaquenil test from the ophthalmologist. I tell her she needs to call in an appointment with a referral and I'll go. That's as far as it gets. Same old story every time I go. I never get a referral. I never get an appointment.

The receptionist took my vital signs. Did my blood pressure and heart rate. Said they were short handed, yet they have a physician's assistant on board. She sat in on my appointment saying she'd never met me before. However, she sat in on my appointment three months ago. I will never get use to a doctor who doesn't care.

After the two second exam, she asked me questions before sending me for a blood test. As usual, she asked if anything changed in my family's history. I told her no that my family is still dead.

When I went in for the blood test and urine test, they left me sitting there while they complained that I didn't give them enough urine. I gave them all I had. I sat there listening to them complain before I asked if I could go. Of course, they didn't have a clue I had overheard them.

I hate being a patient in today's medicine. I've grown so tired of wasting time in doctor's offices only to get a five minute "who cares" exam. So tired of the year after year pill mill. They keep juggling meds and the cost keeps going up. I'm just tired of it all.

If only they could feel the pain and suffering their patients feel. What a different world it would be.

Friday, July 1, 2016

And Some Wonder Why

I spend a great deal of time alone. I don't have any family left to call, or visit, or to fill my life. They have died. I've had to learn to be alone, to adjust to finding ways to have a fulfilling life. When I was diagnosed with lupus, I lost many friends. Say it is due to ignorance or fear of catching something you simply cannot catch, but people left. People who use to encourage me, include me in their lives, etc. They simply didn't want to deal with a sick friend. And it hurt me.

When this disease took away my ability to work, I lost more friends.  Even though I worked in a church, once I left it was as if I died. In a way I did.

I've always had bad experiences with neighbors. They were either judgmental, better than me, or spent more time involved on the wrong side of the law. I never involved myself with people like this. I decided I beat myself up enough without letting others do it for me.

So when I returned to Wilmore, I had hoped to find a better quality of people...those who were loving, kind, accepting. Instead I just moved locations. People are the same wherever you go.

But I pushed on. Always being kind and friendly to my neighbors, Doing unto others.

Tonight I stepped out onto my porch to see the neighbors across the street having a July 4th cookout. They had invited the people next door to them, the ones next door to me and the older couple on the other side of me. In fact, I was the only one who had not been invited. Quite frankly it hurt my feelings. I would probably have turned them down, but it would have been nice to have been asked. Quite obvious when you're the only one left out.

There was a sweet couple in the house next to them a year ago. She decided to have a neighborhood barbecue and invite everyone. She walked from house to house inviting everyone. I went to that barbecue even though I didn't know them. Her hospitality was kind. They moved last summer.

I never did get to know those people across the street from me. They are missionaries and have been gone for a few years before moving back last year. Yet they never attempted to get to know me either. The husband always spoke at a distance. But what shut me down was the episode of a small child who was deliberately hurt in their presence. It was last summer. I had walked outside to sweep the porch when I noticed the little girl down the road standing near the street. The girl who lived there had stood up with a large stick in her hand obviously threatening the small child. I was almost to the end of the steps when I saw the mother stand up from behind her vehicle. She had been witness to what had happened and didn't say a word to the small child.

This small girl rides her bike all over the neighborhood. She finds someone to play with every chance she gets. Never rude. Just lonely. When I saw what this family did to this girl, I decided then and there they were treating her this way because of who she was. A poor child who lived in a trailer down the street. Their actions and the mother's lack of action told me all I needed to know about their lack of character and compassion.

Having worked in two churches in my life, I've seen the other side of what goes on. How ministers and leaders mistreat, judge and make fun of people they don't feel are their equals. I guess missionaries are not immune to this type of behavior. I find myself turning away from people in the ministry, preachers, missionaries, etc. because they are just being paid to do a job. Little do they know these people they laugh at, turn away from, make fun of, etc. will be the souls in Heaven.

So I have mixed feelings. It was obviously a deliberate action to leave me out of the loop. Perhaps they thought I was not good enough for their group. Then again, how would they know? They never took the time to get to know me.

Across the street they see someone who has to stay inside most of the time because the weather affects her health so greatly, but they don't know this. Every thing I do is a struggle, from taking out the trash, to attempting to cut the bushes out front, both of which are observed by the neighbors across the street. Yet no one runs to help when I struggle. Sort of like Dothan. I always thought if I passed out in the front yard, no one would help me. I just never thought Wilmore would be so much like Dothan. If you are not useful to someone, they're not interested in knowing you. I guess it must be a world wide sentiment.

And I have no doubt another reason I am left out is I have never been married. You'd think that odd, but couples don't tend to invite single women to events. I'm sure their judgment includes much speculation even though there is nothing to speculate about.

If they had taken time to know me, they would have found out that I was engaged twice in my life. And I'm thankful I never married those two men. They would have found out I spent most of my childhood, teens, twenties and thirties taking care of sick family members until they died and working full time. They would have found out how deathly ill I became after my father's death, the last member of my family, and how most men wouldn't consider spending a lifetime with someone so sick.

But they never did. Instead it was easier to pass judgment and consume themselves with their own families.

Some wonder why I am the way I am. Add up death, disease, loss of health, etc. Add in how people treat others who find themselves different and not at their own doing. A soul can take only so much without it affecting their life.

So if you wonder why someone you know is the way they are, consider my story. And be kind to them. You have no idea where their life has been and what kind of weight they are struggling through.